Today being Ash Wednesday is the kick off to my favorite Catholic season, Lent. I always look forward to this time of year to recommit to some devotional practices that I let slip throughout Ordinary Time.
I also analyze what I have been doing with the children to help them grow in virtue and faith. I stop and assess how much faith formation all the children have been getting, especially the little ones. Emily and Molly have religion built into their school day, but what about Jack and Lucy? I know I did a lot of Bible reading with Emily and Molly when they were 2 and 3 and I am now looking at my progress with my other little ones. My initial review indicates I need to do more with them, go figure.
And of course we go through our list of sacrifices and other offerings we are planning to make this Lent. The kids (and let's face it, their mother too) don't yet fully grasp this concept because to them the fact that we don't go to Disney every weekend is a living sacrifice and they are not sure if they want to offer more. Yet, we try our best with simple sacrifices, such as the typical no dessert and no chocolate offering.
Now for the confession part. Every Lent this gets me, it just about takes me down within the first moments of this beautiful penitential season. I CAN NOT FAST! I am just about the worst "faster" you will ever meet. If there were a word for the person who thought more about food than ever before, that would be ME (that's right there is a word for that
GLUTTON) . I know the rules. I want to try and somehow I ALWAYS let myself off the hook. I let myself give myself every excuse in the book, "I was nursing, last year...does that still count?", "I have to eat or I will explode on my children...you don't want that to happen right LORD?", "I will fast in the future when I am not having to prepare 35 plates of food a day. There is only so much will power a hungry mom can have."
I know all this "wimpy" complaining does nothing for me compared to the Grace God has in store for me if I would just trust His faithfulness....but yet I have not been able to take that hungry walk with Him.
This afternoon I was on the phone with Brian while complaining that I am terrible at fasting. He said, "you're pregnant, you need a little snack here and there" so I picked something up and as I was opening it, he said "it's not like you're just eating M&Ms." So I put them back down and had a few carrots. Busted!
ReplyDelete--Elizabeth
Elizabeth, you're hilarious! :)
ReplyDeleteLisa, you're a wonderful mama!! and you know that fasting comes in so many forms - some people are great at it and don't eat all day; others have the smaller meals. And you are a mama of five, you are working out all day chasing children, picking them up, I think your fasting is going to look different then others. you are a strong woman; keep up the good fight! :)